


Got The Glam

by InkStainsOnMyHands



Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, Crack Treated Seriously, Ficlet, Makeup, Other, Slice of Life, Undercover Missions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 16:03:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17083394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkStainsOnMyHands/pseuds/InkStainsOnMyHands
Summary: To uncover the shady business practices cosmetics retailers used to scam hard-working customers, Eddie used an undercover identity to get hired at one of the biggest beauty chains in the world. There, he snooped during his part-time shifts. It was nothing he hadn’t done a thousand times before.Besides, he had mused at the dawn of hisbrilliantidea, how hard could makeup be?Gift for the amazingStrozzzi.





	Got The Glam

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Strozzzi (butmicoooool)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/butmicoooool/gifts).



> To my lovely readers: Look, buddy, pal, take this for what it is. Don't expect gold.

Eddie’s self-appointed undertaking wasn’t as easy as he had thought it would be. _That should have been my first clue_ , he pondered to himself as he restocked the cosmetics in his basket. It was common wisdom that assignments were never quite as simple as they appeared to be on the surface.

 

Granted, the mission, itself, was uncomplicated. To uncover the shady business practices cosmetics retailers used to scam hard-working customers, Eddie used an undercover identity to get hired at one of the biggest beauty chains in the world. There, he snooped during his part-time shifts. It was nothing he hadn’t done a thousand times before.  

 

Besides, he had mused at the dawn of his _brilliant_ idea, how hard could makeup be? He had seen Anne apply _primer_ , and _foundation_ , and even _eyeshadow_ many times before. His rudimentary understanding of different products, coupled with his grasp on concepts such as concealing and highlighting, should have been enough to fake his way through his temporary retail associate position.

 

Eddie realized, far too late, that had it not been for holiday season, he would have never passed a job interview to work at this place.

 

Unaware of the complexities of the beauty industry, Eddie was easily overwhelmed with the plethora of options afforded to all types of customers. How could he know the best product for a consumer when there were endless combinations and possibilities?

 

So, when a customer asked him if the concealer in her hand was the correct one for her, all Eddie could do was gape for several moments. Just as he attempted to call someone for help on his two-way radio, he felt the familiar tightness that came from V grasping for control of his body.

 

As though he were a human puppet, V manipulated his mouth to say, “Oh honey, no, that concealer oxidizes after, like, a minute. I can find you something better in the same price range. Come with me.”

 

Both the customer and Eddie were along for a ride.

 

* * *

 

Once he had a free moment alone in the breakroom, with a high-pitched hiss, Eddie asked “How the hell do you know so much about this stuff?”

 

 **I have to watch** **_something_ ** **while you’re asleep.**

 

“So you watch, what? Makeup videos? Where do you even find those?”

 

 **YouTube, Eddie. Duh.**  

 

“Is that why that _Star_ guy keeps popping up on my recommended feed?”

 

**You could learn a thing or two about grooming from him, Eddie.**

 

That rankled him. His grooming was just fine! He had his fair share of unsolicited compliments from both men and women.

 

But, more importantly, “Is this why I suddenly got the idea to do this story?

 

**...I was going to let you have the credit.**

 

Eddie let out a sigh.

* * *

V was so adept at Eddie’s job, it induced a sense of suspicion in some of their customers. It wasn’t as if Eddie actually wore a full-face of makeup while on shift to prove his mettle. (And no, some tinted BB cream did **not** count.)

 

Eventually, when customers would voice their curiosity by asking, “So, how is it you know all this stuff?” V, without missing a beat, would respond, “This is my side gig. I’m actually a performing drag queen.”

 

(Despite Eddie’s chagrin, he had felt strangely complimented by how easily these customers swallowed that answer.)

 

One girl, a teenager searching for the correct shade of foundation for her skin tone, responded, “I should have known.”

 

V, who had been applying a small swatch of a light weight product on the side of her jaw, paused to ask, “Why?”

 

“All drag queens get their lips done.”  

 

Both V and Eddie sputtered.

* * *

 

Eventually, Eddie had to quit his “side gig” and publish his article, much to V’s dismay. For a handful of weeks, they were able to put their expertise to use, and without that creative outlet, V felt a sense of loss.

 

But, Eddie wasn’t cruel. V deserved to have their own interests just as much as he did.

 

Eddie just hoped he bought V the right makeup kit for Christmas.

**Author's Note:**

> Spoiler alert: V loved the kit and used it on Eddie right away.


End file.
